A Trip to the Farm

I think it is pretty clear I am on the precipice here. I am tiptoeing the line betwixt "Girl Who Has Cute Owl Figurines" and "Crazy Old Lady Who Collects Owls and Spies on her Neighbors While Calling the Cops to Report Suspicious Goings-On".


I got two new owls. I now have five. They aren't like books (that can be filled away and enjoyed by others) or like coins (that have value and interest to people other than me). They just sit. And watch. They freak the Kid out so much that they actually all face the wall most of the time. He sneaks in when I'm not looking and turns them all around. I can't say I blame him. Which brings me back to Jesus.

Jesus - all around cool guy since circa 4 B.C.

As a kid, we had this bust of Jesus in our bedroom. My mother put it on top of our dresser and he freaked us right out. He was all white. No irises - no pupils.

 Terrifying to 5 year olds

We finally told her and she was upset but took him away. Before that, we would lay in bed looking at eye-less Jesus and dare each other to climb up and touch him. We never did. My mom replaced him with a cool "Jesus in a field with lambs and children" print that we liked.

 Happy, laughing Jesus! Seen here enjoying a good "pull my finger" joke. 

At least he had eyes.  Kiddo was asking about our religion. We were talking about how God and Jesus are the same but are also Father and Son. We left out the Holy Ghost at this point...because, frankly, I am a little hazy on the whole thing. Anyway, it came back around to Mary and after 20 minutes of "explaining" it to him, he says

"So, is Mary a real person or is she a Jesus?"

Ha!

This is not at all where this post was supposed to go so let's course-correct, shall we? I won a contest! It was a lottery so I had just of good of odds as the next guy! Sonshine - gifted me with this:

Meet Smudge, the world's littlest cutpurse

I know! So cute and he is ready to do the soft-shoe at a moment's notice :D She also sent me a card and the owl came wrapped in this awesome paper! I love fancy paper! I am keeping it in my drawer...until my husband exclaims one day: "Why are we keeping this!?" and I will reply, lamely: "It sure is purtty".

I secretly really want to scrapbook but I think this is as close as I dare to get at the moment;

I also picked up another giant owl from the Dollar Store! His name is Nicodemus (name the movie with the giant owl named Nicodemus and prove how awesome you are) and he is even uglier than Warfina. Which is important. To women and owls. You don't want your man/owl to look more like a girl than you do:

He looks like he is made out of ham in this picture.

I had to slowly integrate the Little One into the...Swath? A swath of owls.  Look, there! A swath of wall eyed owls! Yes, that sounds good. Here he is trying to ingratiate himself by showing his armpit as a sign of deference

The cold, hard, wall-eyed stare of indifference.

And then - the owls, realizing that with the addition of Smudge, that they would out number the humans, accepted him into the fold.

I like listening to them breathe when I am by myself

To the Farm!!!!

We recently(ish) took a trip to the petting-farm and here are some pics to make you want to squeeze cute quadrupeds!

Look! Bunnies reproduce like hydras do! In a few moments, this little one will snap off!

The cutest growth ever  
and I should know

wait for it...

Freedom!

Doesn't it look like a "Benry Knows Best" cartoon character?

How about now?

Off he goes! I can't tell you how badly I wanted to get in this cage. At least my crazy-love is for bunnies and not for Polar Bears, like this lady:

This is why the phrase "Bear Kiss!" will never catch on.

It's OK, the lady is actually just laughing at a funny joke the bear whispered to her

Q: What lies in the shadow of the Garbage Bin?

A: Baby Bunnies :D


Look at this little guy! His name is Rorschach:

You're killing me! Look at the little Horn Spots!

Aww! This mom was calling for her baby who was spazing out and hopping all around the cage: "And watch me run over here! And watch me jump like this!" He finally came over for a bath   :) 

 Who knew lambs were so wrinkly? Wrinkly and delicious.

Now, I have a hard time at the petting farm. I pretty much hover behind my roving horde and try and get Purell on their hands the whole time. I usually get a shoulder or the back of the head, but I try. Dad on the other hand is all "Yeah, wooh, let's touch all the animals' gross mouths and noses!" which is distressing for me because animals can give people diseases! In fact, when we went to see all the brand new calves - we couldn't - as they were all in quarantine! They had some weird skin thing going on and there were signs up not to touch certain other cows all over the place. It was enough for me and I made everyone leave the Infected Bovine Zone. It was as sucessful of an outing to the farm as we've ever had. 

Which reminds me - I once killed a chicken by accident at a working farm that my 7th grade class went to on a field trip. It was highly distressing at the time. Still makes me feel a little oogy. More on that later. Today is April Fool's Day! We woke up Dad by dropping wet washcloths on him! This quickly broke out into an all out water war. Good times! Off now to go put rice in the bottom of his coffee...