This was listed as "Sexy Female Klingon".
Seriously.
Seriously?
Baby, you know I loves you but it's true - you also have a wall eye
but I wasn't going to mention it until you got all huffy.
Yeah, two babies :D She didn't exactly give birth; she was doing her usual "vomiting up entire mouse skeletons" thing she does when out popped the babies!
This is a barfed up mouse. It is called an owl pellet.
I have 15 of them in my room
Let me introduce to you Tammy Faye
It may be wrong but she does look like her
(I photoshopped this all by myself!)
And here's Church!
Aw, he's cute! Just you wait,
he started in with his impression just moments after his arrival.
Let's hope that's a giant thumb in the upper right hand corner
During my Tammy Faye search I found this:
Just you try and sleep tight tonight.
Oh, I also get to drive around in a new car because ours is in the shop! It has satellite radio and controls on the steering wheel - lah-dee-dah! I went to the thrift store tonight and I got all these books for 11 bucks!
I only buy them so I can use them as booster seats when I drive
*Batcabbage - This is Lursa...
So, I am really hoping you meant Bettor :D
This is a Boobed-Klingon
I am going to hunt down the much rarer
Sexy-Boobed-Klingon
I found one! Oh and Lord help me,
next time I do a "Sexy Klingon" search,
I have got to remember to filter the results beforehand :/
next time I do a "Sexy Klingon" search,
I have got to remember to filter the results beforehand :/
I have no idea why my pictures came out all weird or why I have miles of space at the bottom of this post but, I suspect it has something to do with me talking about Tammy Faye.
ReplyDeleteThat's not a sexy female Klingon! Lursa or Bettor is a sexy female Klingon! I can't remember which is the sexy one or the one that looks like a dude. It's one of them, but. (Holy crap, I think I just had a nerd moment of clarity, and my dignity imploded. Smeg!)
ReplyDeleteHoly crap, I think I just had a nerd moment of clarity, and my dignity imploded. Smeg!
ReplyDeleteHaha! That was awesome!
Ah, righty-dokey, then, Lursa is the not-sexy one. And let me just say, that bloke Lursa had some REALLY excellent Klingon boobie work done. You'd never be able to tell that his real name was Billy-Joe-Bob, or something similar.
ReplyDeleteAlso, when it comes to Klingons, sexy is a sliding scale. (Oh, Dignity, how I miss thee...)
You clearly have a better thrift book store if you're finding Christopher Moore books! I always seem to only be able to find old Dean Koontz books...
ReplyDeleteseriously, straight up i want one of those owls. Where are you finding them? I need to get one and put it on my computer stand so he watches me all day long...
ReplyDelete@Batcabbage - Also, when it comes to Klingons, sexy is a sliding scale. (Oh, Dignity, how I miss thee...)
ReplyDeleteLOL! I think it's fantastic :D
@Ashlie - I know, right?! I was thrilled, I also found a copy of "The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night Time". I already own it but I was so excited that I forced it upon another woman standing there. And I suck at selling books "Oh, it's good - it's just so...good." But 4 books - get one free - wheeee!
@Falen - I gets em at "A Buck or Two" - a Canadian dollar store, I'm not sure if you guys have them there. The little guys were only a buck fifty each, can you imagine?!
Joan—you will love Lamb. It is absolutely hilarious!
ReplyDeleteAlso, once my cat barfed up a mouse. It was still alive.
Ok—what I really think happened is that he carried into the house in his mouth, then opened his mouth and let the furry little rodent run amok in and amongst my shoes at the front door. Not exactly a barf, but still…
Hmm. I am not sure how they coont in your dimension, eh, but "a buck fifty" appears to be neither "a buck" nor "two". Most of my parchments are purchased at the sensibly priced "Tuppence or Thereabouts".
ReplyDelete...
Verification word: And yes, if you have recently killed a stag with your bare hands for bloodsport, they will make change for a buck.
@Jenn - Yeah, I was so happy when I found it! I read Fluke and it was hilarious and weird. My two favorite things :) have you read "Six Bad Things"? I highly recommend it.
ReplyDelete@Evil Blam - Hehe, tuppence! You're such a tease.
Yeah! Cheap books! We just had these Bargain Blowout books that went down to $1 and I grabbed like 12 of them. Then I had to sneak them in the house so my Mom would not see that I bought more books.
ReplyDeleteAnd I LOVE the owls. So cute!
Awesome creepy owls!! I want all of them. Why can't I live in Canada?!
ReplyDeleteoooh, Let me know how "The Street of a Thousand Blossoms" is, that's on my list!
WV: thrity- that's how much money I have to spend on books, thrity dollars.
@Sonshine - Blowout books that went down to $1 and I grabbed like 12 of them
ReplyDeleteAnd how could you not?! Ah, I LOVE 1 dollar books! I love not having to hem and haw about which ones to get - I'll take them all! I have never paid full price for a book. 45 dollars!? Not a chance, Corporate Machine, not a chance! Thanks, I love my owls too but Jerko is getting to the "so where are they all going to go" point.
@Palindrome - Yeah, I saw the title and was hooked. I am interested in anything remotely Asian - the reviews seem very good so I am looking forward to it. I am reading "The Book of Other People" at the moment. It is a bunch of different authors writing short fiction pieces. The requirement was to invent a new character and anything else goes. You might really like it :)
Lamb is amazing! As is A Dirty Job, Fool, You Suck, The Lust Lizard of Melancholy Cove (best.title.ever), Island of the Sequined Love Nun (that's a good title too), Coyote Blue, Practical Demon Keeping....I lucked out at a garage sale and got 5 Christopher Moore books for $5 - Score!
ReplyDeleteAlright... I am clearly late to the party so I will keep most of my thoughts and witticisms to myself. I just want to let you all know that the name of the not sexy Klingon that was discussed in the beginning of the comments section was Billy-Bob-Jim-Joe-Horatio-Lou-John the Third.
ReplyDeleteJust in case anyone wanted to look him up.
@Duke - Lucky! I read The Lust Lizard of Melancholy Cove - wasn't it weird and wonderful? I never get that lucky at garage sales and in truth, I can never go alone because I get bullied into buying crap. The last time I went to one, it was terrible. It is such a strange social interaction - the yard sale, isn't it? I feel obligated to buy something so as not to offend my hosts and I think in a way, I want these strangers to like me. Briefly, anyway. Afterward, I am like "Dammit! I spent 10 bucks on a broken VCR rewinder. Again!"
ReplyDelete@Frank - Hey, glad you made it :) Horatio Lou John the Third is what I will name my next pet.
Wow, all the books at my thrift store are stained and crappy. Color me jealous.
ReplyDeleteI haven't paid full price for a book since I was sixteen and started working at B&N.
Oh, and I'm sure your repeated use of the phrase "sexy Klingon" in this post increased your Google hits exponentially.
@Teebore - You know I applied at a bookstore when I was younger and the application asked me to list my 100 favorite books. Holy. Shit. I also didn't have a Bachelor's and so I had no chance. Stiff competition, those bookstores.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I have randomly seen an increase in hits from Norway since this "Sexy Klingon" post.
Ha! Those Norwegians. They love...their sexy Klingons...?
ReplyDeleteThey asked you for your 100 favorite books? What?! sheesh... I wish I had had a question like that on my application. I had to answer a billion questions, which all boiled down to "Will you steal from us?" and "Will you show up for your shifts?"
ReplyDeleteWhat kind of crazy bookstore did you apply to? They just wanted to know if I'd show up every shift. I mostly did for 11+ years.
ReplyDeleteI also love anything even remotely Asian. Some people say that's why I'm dating The Man...okay, he says that. I swear it's not true though! His mind is just...just awesome.
Have you read "Snow Flower and the Secret Fan?" Beautiful.
That little white owl is so cute!!
ReplyDeleteAnd I think that book is going to give me nightmares... With the Songs and Stories by Jim and Tammy *shudder* What terror.
@Teebore - Hehehe! Those crazy Norwegians! I actually wish I was Norwegian...even if it means I have to start fervently googling sexy Klingons.
ReplyDelete@Sonshine - I know! And I was like 19 and hadn't yet read 100 books let alone 100 books I would call my favorite! I didn't read a book of my own volition until I was 10. It was "Shiloh" - and I chose it for the "book I think will win the Newbery Medal" (or something) contest at my school, and I won and I got to meet the author. I didn't read a book for pleasure until I was 17 (Traumatic first grade experience I shall get around to posting)! I missed out on all the good young adult stuff like "Are You There God, It's Me, Margret" and all the other juicy Judy Blume books. I should really get a hold of them.
@Palindrome - His mind is just...just awesome
Right, right - you just want his adorable babies :D
@Achinghope - I know, how was this ever considered to be fit for children?
Ok, Joanie -- I dunno why it took me so long to click your name on a comment at Nikki's blog, but for whatever reason, something possessed me to do so today (hint: it was the overwhelming desire to continue not working), so click, off I go to your profile page, and whoa, is that 'House of Leaves' in there amongst favorite books? and then it was on to blog entries and owl babies and regular unbarfed human babies (pre-parturition hyperemesis gravidarum notwithstanding) and toilet parking and a plenitude of squirty little joy tears eeking out from between my laugh lines, and now it seems I've got however much you've written for however long you've been writing left to read, dammit woman, and thanks a bunch, but no really, because I love you (but a pure and innocent and platonic-type love, see, love like I love pretzels and the smell of sawdust and sheets with a high thread count and Tums) and, you know, just wanted to say so. So. Said.
ReplyDeleteSpeaking of 'House of Leaves': I've got a great... um. What to even call it? Short story? Fictional essay? Mockumentary? Anyways, as far as I know, it's the only short piece that Danielewski's ever written, originally published in a literary journal called Conjunctions way, way back in 2001 (in the pre-LOST days, when I actually read stuff that didn't first appear on my television all waterlogged and surrounded by sand or on some set dressing bookshelf in the background of a hi-def freeze-frame screencap online), and it's pretty supercool & thought you might like it. You may be able to track it down online somewhere, but of course you can't get a copy with all my research notes pencilled in the margins that way, so email me a hey and I'll send it your way.
That was a little unintentional rhyming just then. The hip-hop boys call it 'freestyle,' and obviously I'm a natural, yo.
Joshua- I heart House of Leaves! I would love to have a copy of that as well. My email is on my profile! I would be sooooooo grateful!!!
ReplyDelete@Joshua - Aww, thanks :D I am glad you like my blog and love me like sawdust-smell! I really like hearing that people are being entertained - it makes me really happy to know I have put out my own little lazy piece of good into the world. This comment made my day!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for the offer of the book (I bet your notes are incredible - considering that package you made for Nikki!) but I think Our Little Palindrome wants it bad - she's pretty awesome and a nice girl (for being a crotchety old man) and would put that book to good use.
@Palindrome - Happy Way Early Birthday!